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A knock at the door.
	"Hold on."
	The peephole.
	I blink and squint, and then throw open the deadbolt.  The
door swings inwards.  I stand at the threshold, my jaw slack.
	She has dyed her hair black.  But it's the same; shoulder
length and precision cut, straight and honest.  Black.
	She is wearing contacts, the thin circles of plastic tinted
brown, masking the green.  But I can still see her pupils.  I can still
see her soul.
	There is fear in her eyes.
	"Come in," I say, quietly, for my breath has already been
sucked from my lungs.
	She moves awkwardly, and I can see that under the big
shapeless grey canvas cloak she wears, Grocke holds her left arm with
her right.  Pain--or annoyance--flashes in her face.  Gone is her beret,
gone is her neat trenchcoat and polished synth-leather boots.  Her thin
legs are clothed in a soft blue cloth; hospital scrubs.  
	Her feet are bare.
	"What happened?" I ask.
	She wavers in her step, reaching out for a cane chair.  Her
cape falls open; she is dressed in the same scrubs.  An osmosis sack
wrapped in gauze bulges her bare left arm.
	There is blood on her shirt.
	I pull the seat around and help her into it.  She collapses, a
sole tear of exertion rolling from the corner of one of her eyes.
	"Fucking set me up," she rasps, the tension draining from her
body.
	"What?"
	"Water," she orders.
	I shuffle into the corner of my apartment that is my kitchen
and haul a large plastic bottle from the refrigerator.  I return and hand
it to her.
	Her hand shakes so violently as she tries to drink that she
spills a good deal of it into her lap.
	"Here," I say, grabbing hold of the bottle and helping it to her
mouth.  She looks up at me with tired fury . . . and drinks.
	"Now, what happened?"
	"Does this shithole have curtains?" she asks, almost groggily. 
"Not that it fucking matters.  If they know where I am, they'll have
scanners on us."
	"I'll polarize the windows," I offer.
	She achingly turns her head to me and smiles wryly.
	"Don't fucking bother."
	Grocke closes her eyes.
	I admire her lips.
	"Don't even think about it, fucker," she whispers.  An
intravenous needle, trailing a few centimeters of plastic tubing
suddenly appears in her right hand.
	I chuckle and mutter, "I love you too."
	She smiles again.
	I walk over to the wall switch and black the windows to any
chance observers.
	"Now, how the hell did you-"
	"Fucking set up.  Special Weapons had me doing a little
covert work for them.  Real fucking unusual request, not the shit I'd
expect Megapol to pull.  But I did it, figuring what the hell, new gal
on the job gets to do all the dirty work.  You know, pay your dues and
all that shit."
	"What exactly was the job?"
	Something inside of me is leaching ice into my blood.
	"Nothing you need to know about, fuckhead."
	Black beret, trenchcoat, boots--and something else.
	A long, tan briefcase . . .
	My cheek twitches and I sit down.
	"Did you shoot Simon Bolivar?"
	A pause.
	"Fuck you.  Why the hell would Special Weapons give a fuck
about some SELF jew?  Probably another fucking walking dildo who
wanted to become their head harddrive or whatever.  Yes, I was in the
area at the time--you fucking saw me.  No . . . I didn't do it."
	I want to believe her. 
	I glance down at her eyes.
	They are closed.
	Fuck . . .
	"So if you didn't shoot Bolivar, who did?"
	"I'm fucking telling you I didn't!"
	"I'm not accusing you of that.  I'm just asking what you think
of it."
	"Think of what?"
	"Of who shot Bolivar!"
	"Can you fucking SHUT UP!"
	Grocke is up in the blink of an eye, bowling me over and
winding up with her right hand--with the needle.  I stumble and trip
backwards into my futon bed.  I reach for my plasma pistol--but it's not
under my belt.  The desk--shit.  Throwing up my hands at the last
moment, I somehow catch her arm, staying the two centimeter chisel
of machined alloy and pulling her down with me.
	"What the fuck?" I am yelling.
	"Shut up!  Shut up!  Fucking shut up, fuckstick!" Grocke
babbles.  She struggles, feebly trying to jab me with the needle.
	A moment passes before Grocke realizes that she hasn't the
strength to fight.  Her body turns to jello in my arms, her crying
gradually reducing itself to muffled moaning.  
	She drops the spike.
	I pat her on the back and hold her, firmly but gently.
	She shot Bolivar.
	She was given a set of keycards, one of which was an office
for rent across from the stage--a clear view from the third floor of the
whole Concourse.  She arrived thirty minutes prior, a few minutes
behind schedule.  She put on a pair of thin synth-leather gloves,
sighted up her rifle, and waited.
	And then she shot Bolivar.
	We lay there, she quietly sobbing, myself vigorously
contemplating the unsavory task of calling in Megapol on the poor
thing.  I reach over and palm the needle.  I chuckle, somewhat
thankfully.  It's blunt, probably some connecting piece between
hospital equipment.
	I gradually roll Grocke off to one side.  I try to stand up.
	"Where are you going?" she asks in an all-too-timid voice.
	"Need to make some calls."
	Need to get some of those motherfuckers with the stun
grapples in here, actually.  I don't go for that praying mantis shit. 
Sorry.
	"Don't," she replies, pulling on me, squirming to the center of
the bed.  She coyly kisses me on the tip of my nose.
	I glance down at the back of her right hand.  It is shaking. 
She tries to hide it, batting her eyes and kissing me.
	"What about the virus?" I whisper, lying down with her.
	She closes her mock-brown eyes, a wave of sadness rippling
across her features.
	"That's where they found me, in the Clinic.  Fuckers went to
the wrong room and passed mine; my technician suddenly had a
personal call.  I figured it was time to get the fuck out of Dodge."
	"Who?"
	"Altacat Battalion.  Black-ops Special Weapons.  They
fucking set me up, had me do their dirty laundry, and they were going
to fucking finish me off.  They killed my contact at the Senate.  The
fuckheads fucking double crossed me."
	"Do they wear black berets?"
	"Yes."
	I close my eyes as Grocke opens herself to me.
	"Why are you telling me this?"
	"Because I need your help."
	"What the hell can I do?"
	She brushes my hair with one of her hands.
	"Silly little rich boy.  Went to school for what--five, six years? 
And you still don't have a fucking clue what you are."
	Silly little rich boy?
	Pretty girl--you smell vaguely of disinfectants and latex--you
have been busy, haven't you?  Paranoid--you've surely read my files,
just as I tried to read yours.  I wonder what you found--Lifetree,
Marsec, and a little company from twenty some years back called Oort
Ventures?  You've known from the day you laid eyes on me, haven't
you, right?  Did you follow the umbilical cord back to Guam, to that
hospital in Buenos Aires?  Did you read my parents' files, too?  My
psyche evaluations?  Did you like what you saw?
	I'll bet you did.
	I open my eyes and grimace, turning away from her.
	"You don't love me, do you?"
	Grocke does not answer.  I feel her body tense up.  Frowning,
I catch a hint of movement in the corner of my eye.
	Shit.
	I roll off of Grocke and take in the situation with one slow
glance.  
	There are at least eight of them, black berets and tan
trenchcoats bulging with weapons; brutally anonymous, each face
bland, bored--the same crew which ambushed Andy and myself on the
way to the Purple Lotus.
	The blond-haired motherfucker nearest me holds up my
plasma pistol.
	Glancing around at his peers, he smiles evilly.  "What say we
come back in about thirty minutes?  Give Casey dear some time to say
goodbye?"
	It is the janitor, the janitor who shot Drewski.  His twin blue
laserbeam eyes are fixed on my forehead.
	"How?" I stammer.
	"Magnetic lockpick," whispers Grocke, her arms around my
waist.  She is shivering worse than I am.
	"O-la, mayhican," he sneers.  "Looks like our paths have
crossed again."  He points my pistol at my forehead.
	I'm so desensitized to the sensation I no longer blink.
	Examining the plasma's handle, he says, "I see you're down
by four rounds.  Carlson, recharge the man's weapon."
	Four rounds?  Shit . . .
	WHA-A-A-AM--thunder rolling off the concrete and
ductwork of that parking garage corridor's walls and ceiling, the big
Megapol man flipping backwards, his eyes hidden by a black riot
helmet's visor but his mouth surprised, cursing.  A spray of rich red
blood.  Snarling,--his lungs deflating, his heart a mashed smear of
cartilage and muscle.
	I killed a man with those.
	Does he know?
	Our eyes meet, a thin smile on his lips, a wicked, evil look in
his eyes.
	Oh God, he knows.
	Another pale man, this one with brown hair and brown eyes
and an utterly forgettable face takes my pistol, pops the magazine, and
fishes a replacement out of a pocket on his jacket.
	The janitor returns the reloaded gun to my desk.
	"Thanks," I mumble.
	"No problem, chico.  Friends gotta watch out for friends,
right?"
	What the fuck?
	"Isn't that right, Casey?  You with us or what?  Trying to run
for the border with our mutual amigo here?" the blond continues. 
"Because you have a choice here.  The organization needs manpower--
excuse me--we live in a politically correct day and age--people power--
but not so badly that we have to employ every lecherous little tramp
that we find sleeping in the gutter."
	I can feel Grocke's nails digging through my shirt.
	"So you can join, and get your former friends off your back,
or," the blond's eyes twinkle mischievously, "we can do their job for
them."
	Grocke's breath comes short and fast.
	"Who are you?" I ask, my voice clear and defined at last.
	The seven other berets swivel their heads toward me, as if
seeing me for the first time.
	The blond removes his ice stare from Grocke and cocks his
head, his smile dropping from his face.
	"Are you acquainted with the phrase, 'Curiosity killed the
cat?'  It's an old English metaphor, not literally very relevant these
days, but none the less fairly pertinent in this case."
	The ex-janitor lowers his eyes and polishes his right index
finger with his thumb.
	"Kraus," he orders.
	One of the berets near the back of the crowd pulls out a small
black box.  It rests easy in the palm of his large tanned hand.  He
strides over and levels one of its faces at my head.
	"Kraus here has a neural disruptor.  At close range, a short
burst will wipe your short term memory.  At longer ranges, of up to
half a meter, it will trigger a massive seizure akin to epilepsy.
	"Do you know what epilepsy is, Karl?"
	I nod my head slowly, my eyes fixed on the ominous weapon.
	Blond looks up, his blue eyes burning holes in mine again.
	"Except that disruptor seizures are specialized.  They fry your
brain's pain centers."
	I feel Grocke move out from behind me.
	"If Kraus hits the switch, you will shit in your pants.  You
will shit in your pants, flop like a fish, and then you will die."
	I nod.
	The blond janitor leans back to the man named Carlson.
	"Will he die?" he whispers, his eyes still fixed on me.
	"I don't know," shrugs Carlson.
	The janitor snorts.
	"Only one way to find out.  Kraus, give him a two-"
	"No."
	The blond and myself turn to my side.  Grocke, clutching that
useless metal shard, rolls off the bed.  The nearest trenchcoats go for
their weapons--but she's already pitching a chair at them, rushing for
the door.  The man named Kraus twists and tenses his hand.
	Grocke shrieks and goes down in a heap.
	Kraus moves in for the kill.
	"Hey, hey--watch that thing!  Somebody could lose an eye!"
yells the janitor.  Kraus give him puzzled look and steps back.
	The berets' leader crouches down next to Grocke and helps
her up--promptly putting her in a full nelson.
	"You've got nerve Casey-"
	"Leave me alone, fucker!" she squeals, struggling to break his
grasp.
	"-I'm sorry, I can't do that.  You are coming with us."
	"Get your fucking hands off me!"
	"You're either going to leave walking-"
	"Fuck you!"
	"-or in a bag.  I don't want to put you in a bag."
	"Fuck you, cocksucker!"
	The janitor rolls his eyes and sighs.
	"Kaufman," he orders.
	A lean, unhealthy-looking man steps over to Grocke and
grabs her jaw.  He shakes his wrist and a butterfly knife flips open.
	The blond presses his face into the short black hair around
Grocke's ear.
	"Now hear me out, bitch," he spits, "the organization needs
cannon fodder and I'll be damned if you aren't fucking fine raw
material.  You have nerve, and lucky for you, we happen to like that. 
But don't play games with us, or we will cut your pretty little body into
rat food.  You wouldn't enjoy that, would you?  Nobody would give a
fuck, you know.  Dead little whore, nobody would give a God damn
about that."
	He relaxes his hold on her.  
	Grocke is crying, her eyes red and tears darkening her
hospital gown.
	In a somewhat gentler voice he continues.
	"You wanted to make something of yourself, didn't you?  You
wanted something else, didn't want to wind up an old maid in the
projects.  So you chose Megapol.  It was the best you could do,
considering that Marsec requires high school diplomas from their
recruits.  You chose Megapol, and by the word on the street, I hear
that you've been making quite the name for yourself."
	The janitor releases Grocke, and she collapses to the floor,
her tear and sweat streaked hair brushing my wall.  The blond goes
down on his haunches to stay close to her ears.
	"But what's the price?  I know you're pulling thirty thousand
dollars annual, but what do you have to give them in return for it? 
Loyalty?  Fine.  That's a just price.  But Megapol didn't stop with that,
did they?  They took your sense of shame, too.  Took your virginity
and put you on a street corner all in the name of the law.  That's
bullshit, pure and simple.  Bullshit.
	"The organization will not give you bullshit.  We will not
take away from your pride.  We will not make you whore yourself out. 
We will not do that, because we respect each other far too much for
that.  Respect.  It's what you want.  It's what we're going to give you."
	The janitor leans over Grocke, nearly kissing her in the ear.
	"Are you with us?"
	She nods her head.
	"Let's go."
	Two berets crack open the doorway and exit.  Two more flank
Grocke and gently pull her to her feet.  The three of them gingerly
walk out of my apartment.
	The blond turns to me.
	"There are some things dinero can't buy, mayhican."
	I snort and frown.
	"You still haven't told me who you are."
	"And I won't," he replies, touching my pistol, "because you
don't need to know."
	He glances up at me and smiles, almost kindly.
	"What you do need, however, is a lesson in humility.  Kraus?"

Grocke lies beside me, her hospital garments shed.  We are back in
Petrograd block, sleeping on a futon of crushed bamboo leaves.  I
touch her in the small of her back, and she responds to my touch,
rolling onto me, resting her shoulders against my shoulders, her hips
against mine.
	"I too have killed," she says, all the effort and fatigue gone
from her voice.
	I nod my head knowingly.
	"Did you kill Bolivar?"
	She is silent, her green eyes hidden from me--"My eyes?  My
fuckin' eyes always give it away."
	"I love you," I reply.
	Her arms go around me and we kiss.
	"Jack Rawlings ordered his ship's crew to the sole escape
capsule.  Forcing them aboard the small launch, he cast them off," she
states with undeserved innocence.
	"You don't love me, do you?"
	She answers me with a kiss.
	Then I feel the sharp pain in my back, all my muscles
contracting out of my control, a full body cramp, I twitch and squeal
and black out . . .

I touch my back and roll over on my bed.  Glancing at the clock, I've
been out for upwards of two hours.  I feel thirsty and not at all rested.
	The bastards stunned me.
	They stunned me, and then drank the last two cans of my
beer.  Fucking bastards.  I wonder if they fucked up my computer, too? 
Probably copied my pornography archives and then deleted them.
	I check my lapcomputer.  It seems in decent shape.
	I plug it into the wall and send it for the SELF webpage.  I
fetch a glass of water in the meantime.
	Returning to my seat, my screen reads:  DOMAIN
RESTRICTED, UNDER VIOLATION OF MEGAPRIME
TERRORISM/CIVIL DISOBEDIENCE ACT, CHAPTER 14,
PARAGRAPH 1.
	Oh boy.  
	Not good.  
	Oh boy.
	Out of curiosity, I check the Church of Sirius domain.  It too
is defunct, a similar notice plastered on my screen.
	I run over my bookmarks of related sites.  I finally reach the
ACLU website, near the bottom of my list, before I get anything more
than a blank screen.
	"SENATE DEMANDS LAW AND ORDER, CRACKS
DOWN ON TERRORISM IN WAKE OF MOB VIOLENCE."
	According to their headline story, "a number of heavily armed
Sentient Engine Liberation Front (SELF) supporters attempted to
storm the City Senate chambers after being incited into a bloodcrazed
frenzy by their fanatical leader, Simon Bolivar."
	The American Civil Liberties Union has never been known
for its radical views.
	My stomach fills with cold bile as I scan the rest of the
article.  ". . . Bolivar's location unknown . . . most likely fled after
Megapol scrambled their forces . . . timely intervention . . . renewal of
contract assured . . . a shocked and horrified Senator Yuan . . .
issuance of a new, zero-tolerance policy . . . a new age of anti-
terrorism."
	Lies, lies, lies, I want to scream.  Lie after lie, piled upon a
solid foundation of lies.  Pictures of dead Megapol officers.  Promises
of vengeance.  Raids upon six different SELF headquarters, dozens of
illegal artificial intelligences captured, their memories scanned for
clues to Bolivar's location . . .
	A wall of lies, behind which is the truth, strangled and naked,
beated, raped, and left to die.
	
5/9/98

Bonus:  A Summary of the Major Characters of Apocalypse Arc.

Natalie S. Hawthorne, aka "Thorne":  Samurai
	Eye color:  Dark, dark brown bordering on black.  Weapon: 
Paired lawpistols.
	Life on the streets has been good to Nat.  Adopted daughter of
Enrique Oscuro (quite the incestuous relationship, eh?), her rank in
this 'criminal' organization is second only to 'Los Cuatro Caballeros'--
the Four Horsemen.  These were the men who founded Diablo . . . rest
assured that Nat's tiny toes will more than fill their boots.
	Prediction:  That middle initial stands for something.

Warren Opal-Learner Fangman, aka "Wolf" or "Mike Force":  Pimp
	Eye color:  Blue.  Favorite toy:  Marsec Flight Shotgun.
	Wolf is an old friend of Karl Williams from Buenos Aires. 
Under a life-debt to Nat and Diablo, he's in charge of  'servicing' Nat's
physical needs.  Previously a high-ranking SELF member, Wolf is
going to jail for a variety of crimes against the state.
	Note:  This guy is modeled after your best friend who happens
to be more handsome than you.
	Prediction:  This joker is the highest card in a certain
organization's hand.

Hap Reynolds:  Fallen Angel
	Eye color:  Melancholy brown.  Favored weapon:  Megapol
Autocannon.
	Also under a life-debt to Diablo, Hap is torn by his conflicting
loyalties.  Luckily, his enemies--and friends--do not recognize this. 
Only one thing remains constant in his life--a base desire to watch a
certain grey Valkyrie go down in flames.
	Prediction:  Hap will find a way out.

Casey Grocke, Lieutenant (Megapol):  Whore
	Eye color:  Green.  Favored weapon:  Laser rifle.
	Ex-Vice Squad, Grocke killed Simon Bolivar . . . or did she? 
And why is she hunted by the mysterious black berets?  Set to
disappear for a good while, Grocke will be back, but she won't be on
Megapol's side and she definitely won't be working the corners.
	Prediction:  There is a reason this is an XCOM story . . .	

Karl Williams, aka "Peace Umeda":  Pawn
	Eye color:  Brown.  Unfortunately necessary weapon:  Plasma
type two.
	Normally ungodly rich parents would translate into a cushy
lifestyle of pleasure.  However, Karl wasn't born to that kind of family. 
"The easiest way to wreck a kid's life is give him a trust fund," his dad
once said.  "We're going to spend it all [your inheritance] before we
die!" said his mom.  With parents like that, who needs enemies?
	Note:  This character is based on someone very close to
myself.

Jack Rawlings, Sergeant (XCOM):  The Bodyguard
	Eye color:  Utterly forgettable brown.  Favored weapon: 
Modifed heavy plasma (plasma type five) with under barrel grenade
launcher and sanded sights.
	There's Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and Jack Rawlings. 
Guess who got to kick the aliens' asses at Cydonia?
	This is the man who killed the alien brain at Cydonia.  This is
the man who founded Marsec.  This is the man who suicided his ship
at T' Eleth so a small XCOM force could take down the aliens forever. 
He is dead, as dead as all his comrades from the First Alien War . . .
	Yeah, you're probably wondering why the hell I'm including
this guy in the major characters list.  Well, if I get around to finishing
this set of stories, I will tie these into my wonderful Kansai Arc.
Which, if you haven't read, makes a great way to waste an evening.
	Prediction:  What is a samurai without his master?

Ben Fischer, www.geocities.com/NapaValley/3169/index.htm

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