With all the bile and bitterness that can erupt around the newsgroup, I sometimes wonder if there's some set formula for:
1) Mumble something about a new box set and wasted money on old rules
2) Compare the victim to a dairy product
3) Compare the victim's painting to kindergarten refrigerator art
4) Put the words "price" and "increase" in the same sentence
5) In any gaming conversation, mention, "you're gonna hate this - guess what GW did this time"
6) Say "Squats" to a 40K player
7) Say "New Warlord Titan" to a long-time Epic player
7.5) say "Nagash" to a WHFB player
8) Say "Those don't look like GW minis to ME, bud!"
9) Tell a newbie how little you paid for your Plastic marine squad - 9 years ago.
10) Every 5 minutes of a game, begin a sentence with "But according to Jervis and Andy..."
11) If the gamer is Australian, tell 'em how much of a discount you get from that American hobby shop you once visited.
12) Mumble something about Power armor or spells being removed from the rules in a future edition
13) Watch 'em carry all their stuff into a hobby shop for some in-store gaming, and then immediately set up your CCG tournament on the last available gaming table.
14) Mention that Stargrunt rules only cost $24, just when the victim has purchased his first 40K boxed set.
15) Hang Ral Partha miniatures in front of the GW minis on the racks.
16) Have a D&D game next to a really heated GW game session, and keep rolling dice under their table "on accident"
17) Ask 'em why their dice don't have NUMBERS, like REAL dice do.
18) Play 'em in a game of Epic and keep trying to roll to hit with a 20-sided die.
19) Compare the rules of GW games to leading competitors, and talk about how much fun you had playing "generic" games.
20) If the game is 40K or Epic, ask why they keep bringing out a collector card game in the middle of the battle (i.e. the psyker/magic cards)
21) One phrase: "Hey, is that kinda like Dungeons and Dragons?"
I'm hurting myself.
Tom Beliech